Miss Funny Pants Extraordinaire

Beautiful State, A Lot of Ugly Ignorance

2012-01-06T13:45:00.001-06:00

So here’s what I have to say about the Arizona chicks that are badmouthing Mexicans. First off, they are a complete joke. “Is this on? Can you see me? Is it recording?” They can’t work a camera, they don’t have their facts straight, and they look like absolute fools. It’s unfortunate they were brought up so shitty. Then to lay on all fours smacking your ass towards the camera- classy. I can’t wait for them to go to Cancun where they’ll be filmed and put on Girls Gone Wild yelling, “I love Mexico” with their tops off. Those are some balls to be putting yourself out there for the world to see how ugly you are. My first reaction was absolute hatred, don’t get me wrong I still hate them, but then I thought they must be such an embarrassment to their parents. Then someone said to me, “Why? Their parents are probably the SAME way.” How is this still happening? Was our attack on the Jewish not enough? And then again towards the Japanese after the U.S. said we would never let that type of behavior happen again. I really feel sorry for how simple minded and ignorant some people are. And for the last time WHITE PEOPLE WERE NOT THE FIRST ONES HERE! It doesn’t matter who was here first anyway!

I always think that everything happens for a reason. And I’ve been wanting to move to Arizona for a few years now. I couldn’t figure out why things weren’t coming together for me to go out there. And now it’s so clear. I wanted to move everything there. Myself, my family, my pets. This move would have brought Arizona a lot of money. Especially since I had planned on opening businesses out there. After everything that’s been going on, I want nothing to do with that place. There’s no way that I’m giving that state ANY of my money. And I’m not taking my family to a state that’s full of racial discrimination. Now, I understand it’s not EVERY person in Arizona. I have friends that are out there and that don’t feel that way. I want to make it clear that I am not attacking EVERY person that lives in Arizona, but I won’t risk having my family be around such racism. It has become apparent to me that it would happen more so in Arizona than it would here. Unfortunately, the first thing a lot of people think of when they think of Arizona is the racism. I personally as well as my family have dealt with racism our whole lives. People telling me that I wasn’t good enough or that I was this or that. Or guys that wouldn’t go out with me because of my nationality. Way to judge me for something I can’t change. Karma has sympathy for no one. And just remember, today the attack is against Mexicans, tomorrow it could be YOU. Choose your words wisely, you may be next.

Love what I have to say about it or hate it I don’t care.

Playboy’s Miss Social Semi-Finals and Finals

2011-09-14T09:32:00.001-05:00

It’s so close I can almost grab it!

I just got some news yesterday that everyone can pass along. Semi-Finals are September 25-26 and the Finals are September 28-29. In order to be in the SEMI-Finals, I need to either get 500,000 votes OR have the most votes out of everyone in the leaders group for Sugar. So I have to be number 1 by the time they end voting which is about noon central time. In order to make sure that I'm in the FINALS I need 750,000 votes. So I need to have one of those three things by September 25.

I know some of you have been voting every day and some every hour. I really appreciate all of the support. They recently announced that the winner, first, second, and third runners up will be going to the Halloween Bash at the Playboy Mansion!

My birthday wish is still to win this! There’s not much time left, so I hope you’re voting as often as you can!

Thanks for all the help everyone! Please spread the word!

http://apps.facebook.com/playboymisssocial/media/25410

I AM Playboy’s Miss Social!

2011-09-09T11:14:00.001-05:00

Ok, maybe not yet, but I REALLY want this! Voting has been going on for a few days now and I have been all over the charts. Lately, I’ve been going up and down from 11th to 7th place. I want to be number 1! I need 750,000 votes to secure my spot in the FINALS. Once I’ve reached 750,000 votes please STOP voting. Save your votes for the finale. On that last day every vote and every second count. Last month, there was a girl that had the number one spot for what seemed like forever, last minute someone else took the crown. There are so many different ways to get free votes. You can also purchase votes. For $20 you can get 5000 votes! Also, if you have Facebook credits, you can use those towards buying votes. I think I would make a GREAT Miss Social and I hope that you guys feel the same. PLEASE vote for me and spread the word! I really appreciate all of the support. If I win, I get a pictorial in Playboy. ME in PLAYBOY! Also keep in mind that this is a non nude competition. So if you don’t see anyone naked, that’s why. Please help me win! My birthday is this month and I can’t think of a better present to get from all of you than to vote for me and have me win this! Thank you everyone! Hopefully you’ll be able to see me while flipping through the pages of Playboy soon! ** http://apps.facebook.com/playboymisssocial/media/25410** Click to vote! Even if you don’t go on and vote, click this link when you log into your Facebook account! It will help me out a lot! XOXO

I’ve added this picture to help people out. The voting can be a little confusing. You can get votes tons of ways. If you hover over my picture, you’ll see a shadow with the Facebook F and a word bubble. Click that to update your status on Facebook. You get votes if you do it once, and then if you do it 10 more times. You can also update your Twitter the same way by clicking the T when hovering over my picture. You can also get votes by scrolling through the profiles. Also, voting gets you more votes! Just remember to keep clicking on the hearts until they are gray. Once they are gray, you need to get more votes. You can also see the other pictures I have up when you hover over my picture. At the bottom of my picture it will say “My Photos” Click on that to see the others!

Check out the video I made! I’ve posted it to my profile, but am waiting for approval.

Voting!!

2011-09-06T20:23:00.001-05:00

Voting for Playboy’s Miss Social has begun! Tell everyone that you come into contact with and help me win! I appreciate all of the support!!

http://apps.facebook.com/playboymisssocial/media/25410

Yes, that is a gold Playboy key. My mom passed it down to me years ago. I’m ready to join my Bunny Sisters. I had a dream a few days ago that I had tons of votes and was winning this competition. Help me make my dream a reality!

Playboy Miss Social

2011-09-01T07:11:00.001-05:00

Guess who has entered this contest? Yep, that’s right. There are some amazingly beautiful girls that have entered and are kicking ass! If you vote for me, and you tell all of your friends to vote for me, and your friends tell all of their other friends to vote for me I just may be able to win this! I really hope to gain some great exposure from this and do a lot of good for others. Help me out and spread the word! Follow this link and vote! http://apps.facebook.com/playboymisssocial/media/25410

Thank you everyone! I appreciate all of your support!

Neverwhere

2011-08-22T18:36:00.001-05:00

It’s no secret how much I love Alice in Wonderland. When Neverwhere came up I was so there. A Neil Gaiman book that follows the Lady Door on her quest to avenge her family’s death. An unsuspecting soul by the name of Richard Mayhew gets sucked into this quest by accident when he finds Door bloody and unconscious on a sidewalk in London. Against his fiancés wishes, he helps the girl and takes her back to his apartment. This is where the madness begins.

At first this book can be a bit tricky. It goes back and forth from London Below and London Above. It’s quick to catch as you get sucked into the book. Definitely has an Alice feel to it, but much darker. I loved this book. Neil Gaiman is an amazing writer and so far the books I’ve read by him are phenomenal. I can’t wait to see what I’ll get my hands on from him next.

Corey Taylor and SpongeBob??

2011-08-22T11:10:00.001-05:00

Staind’s Aaron Lewis had a benefit concert this weekend called It Takes A Community that had proceeds go to local elementary schools. Corey Taylor was one of the performers. Along with Stone Sour and Slipknot songs, he also covered Pink Floyd, Tom Petty, and Peter Gabriel. It was his ending piece that I think got to every parent’s heart. With a choir of children as backup, here is a video that was shot by an audience member.

I would have LOVED to have heard the other songs he played, but this was exceptionally cute. Sure a man can go from singing about slitting throats and fucking the wounds to children’s cartoon theme songs. Isn’t that what being a parent does to you? If the women didn’t love him before, they sure love him now!

Pole Dancing Hitting The Mainstream

2011-08-21T12:50:00.001-05:00

Quick post, but I was SO excited to see that in Shakira’s new video she’s pole dancing! In the Spanish and English version of “Rabiosa” she’s rocking it. Then I was watching Cobra Starship’s video for “You Make Me Feel” Sabi is working a pole too! I’ve posted up the videos here. I hope you’re as excited as I am about it!

Whale Wars

2011-08-16T17:27:00.001-05:00

WHALE WARS!! Who watches?? I’ve been watching since day one of the first season on Animal Planet. LOVE IT! For those of you that don’t know, Whale Wars follows the Sea Shepherds who are as they call them “modern day pirates” along on their fight to stop the Japanese from illegal whaling. The battles get pretty crazy along with some very close calls. You have to know this is all taking place in the Antarctic waters where it is freezing.

The crew originally only had one ship, the Steve Irwin. Now they have the Steve Irwin, Gojira, and due to a generous donation from Bob Barker, they have the Bob Barker. They’re non-profit and rely on donations from the public. I had thought it would be lots of fun to go on a campaign with them, but I think that might be a bit too cold for me. Besides in the first season they told them that they could shower I believe it was only once every two days and that they had to conserve water…. I like to shower a lot. And I take forever showering, so no that just won’t do. Season 4 just wrapped up and I haven’t gotten a chance to watch the last episode yet. So no one spoil it for me!

Sesame Street

2011-08-12T17:32:00.001-05:00

By now I think everyone has heard about the petition to either have Bert and Ernie get married on Sesame Street or to have a transgender character on the show. Sesame Street say that Bert and Ernie have no sexual orientation. I think it would be good to help kids be more understanding and open to the idea of something that is going to be out in the open with less criticism than it is now. This is just as bad as it was when people criticized mixed raced relationships. If that were still the case now, I’d be in trouble. I date outside of my race a lot. In the end, who really gives a shit. It’s not going to poison kids minds. They’re not teaching kids to take drugs or commit murders. Relax people, it’s just love. As for the transgender character, who do you think they would have? Do you think they’d bring a new muppet on?

Chris Star Back on the Radio!

2011-08-05T21:36:00.001-05:00

That’s right, I’m going to be back on the air with my own show! I am super excited and I hope you are too! Listeners will be able to text in comments, questions, or ideas for future shows while we are live on air. Listeners will once again be able to listen to my crazy voices and stories along with news about music, celebrities, movies, the world, and whatever listeners can come up with! I’m still trying to get all of the loose ends tied up before I actually get back on air. The hold up is trying to get things perfect! Feel free to send me a tweet or post on my wall if you have any ideas for a show!

Kuma’s Corner

2011-07-01T17:42:00.001-05:00

If you have not been, you just don’t understand. These are THE burgers hands down! The place is amazing. Most of the burgers are named after metal bands.

I have been three times so far and can’t wait for the next time. I can’t eat another burger without being like, “It’s just not Kuma’s.” The place is not big, so you have to be patient. As the patrons there say: If you can stand the wait, you’ve passed the test. Most of the time that I’ve been there the hostess will tell you that the wait is about 2 and a half to 3 hours long. I’ve never had to wait that long. You can not have more than 6 at a table, so don’t try to bring a party in there because you will get split up. The bar is first come first serve. If you come and sit at the bar on a busy day, prepared to be hovered over. People will drink at the bar while waiting for a table and some will wait by you so that they can take your spot when you leave.

Every month they have a new special. And they always have new beers coming in. Ask the bartender to surprise you. I don’t drink, but everyone always says they have great stuff. They have great pictures all over the place. They used to have waffle fries, but they got rid of them. There was a huge panic and uproar about it. They have fresh cut fries that are really good, so everyone should quit bitching now. They also have chips if that’s your thing. Though they are big on meat, they do have a veggie burger (I think that’s what it is) so if you’re about saving the cows, they have something for you to eat there as well.

They are also down the street from Bleeding Heart Bakery. After you’ve had your fill at Kuma’s you can head on over there for some cupcakes.

I was recently on my way to work and had the radio on in the car and there was an interview with Lady Gaga. She said that one of the first things she does when she is in Chicago is that she goes to Kuma’s Corner. And she waits the 3 hours or however long it is for her. She said that the only time she’s ever had a diva moment Is when she saw that they took away the Judas Priest burger. They made her two and she ate them both and left with her friends plastered off her ass. The more I talk about this place, the more I find people that have been there, and it’s a lot of people that I would have never ever thought would go there or would even have heard about it.

You can see the many awards they have won for being so yummy!

This meat happy bear is my favorite picture in the whole place. I want one.

I’m pretty sure they have movies at the place, but I’ve never seen this television turned on in the times I’ve been there. I know they don’t use it to broadcast any of the sports games, so I’m not sure what they play on it.

Make it a point to get your ass out there and try this place out. You won’t be disappointed. And while you’re there try the Kuma’s Nuggets for an appetizer. They are supposed to be at Lollapalooza this year. If they are crazy on regular days, I can’t even imagine how insane it’s going to be there. People will probably die of heat exhaustion just waiting for a burger. Totally worth it. Take a look at their menu, rules, hours, and location at Http://KumasCorner.com.

Battle Brothers

2011-05-25T11:10:00.001-05:00

Brothers Dance Step Duel - Watch more Funny Videos

I thought this little duel was quality and had to share it! The little brother looks like a dancing doll.

The Damned Things

2011-05-16T21:35:00.001-05:00

After weeks of anticipation, guess who I went to see? If you didn’t guess The Damned Things after reading the title of this blog maybe you should stop reading. The Damned Things includes Scott Ian and Rob Caggiano of Anthrax, Keith Buckley and Josh Newton of Every Time I Die, and Joe Trohman and Andy Hurley from Fall Out Boy. Their album Ironiclast is SO good. It definitely makes me happy.

I had seen that they were going to be playing a free show, but I couldn’t believe my ojos. After checking everything out, it was true. They were going to be here and for free. I was so excited. Off I went, all by myself, that’s how hardcore I am. I was up at the front on the barricades as I almost always am. Note to you, if you ever want to see me at a concert, look for me up at the barricades, I’m almost ALWAYS there.

I was already out and had forgotten to bring my camera, so I used my phone that was already low on battery but I got tons and tons of pictures. I took over 500 pictures.

It was great! They played my two favorite songs back to back (“Black Heart” and “Little Darling”) The show absolutely rocked. The place was going nuts. There was so much energy up on stage.

I had been to this bar before and wasn’t sure how they were going to pull this off because their stage isn’t that big. They built a stage in a larger part of the bar for them to play and it was massive and gave them enough room to jump around. I didn’t even know this place had barricades.

After a security guard threatened to kick me out AFTER the show was over for trying to grab a pic and a set list, I ended up getting one of Scott Ian’s picks, one of Rob Caggiano’s picks, and the set list that Josh Newton signed for me. I was going to stick around to see if any of the other members would come out to sign my set list, but I didn’t want to risk someone trying to take it or ruin it. It is a PERFECT copy. Yes, I love music, bands, concerts, and will always act like a little school girl when I get to meet bands and they’re nice and when I get things from them. I don’t care, it’s my thing.

Security cannot defeat me on getting memorabilia from bands!

I think one of the best parts of the night was when I came home and was sending one of my friends some of the pictures. He responded at once point with “I swear the bald headed guitarist looks like the guy from Anthrax.” I swear I thought he was joking at first. I sent back, “Scott Ian? It IS the guy from Anthrax.” He will remain nameless. He’s more of a Fall Out Boy fan, so he’s forgiven.

I think they’re a great band and can’t wait for them to come back into town! I hope to see them again soon! Maybe next time I can meet the band and they’ll take some pictures with me.

Not So Breaking News

2011-05-02T14:06:00.001-05:00

Everyone has heard all over the world by now that Osama Bin Laden is dead. I, like many people living online, heard about it through Twitter. I thought it was a joke at first, so I searched it. Sure enough, there it was that the president was about to speak about the death and confirmation of his body. I was really hoping that they would have shown pictures of his body on the news or on one of the sites where they were confirming this, but I had to search on my own.

I know many people said that they didn’t know how they confirmed that it was his DNA match. On the news, I had heard that Bin Laden’s sister’s brain had been in storage. When she died, the U.S. kept her brain so that we could have it for a DNA sample. Kind of fucked up, but if that’s what it takes to confirm that we killed the right man so be it.

I read a lot of different responses to his death. Some relieved, some angry, some hopeful, some scared. I have mixed feelings about the whole thing. I don’t think that this is the end by any means. At the same time, I really hope that for the loved ones of those that were killed on 9/11 there is some sort of closure or help with healing.

I think I read some of the funniest things on Twitter last night from people making jokes about how he was caught to people hoping that Obama would come out to the Team America theme song. Today people are still cracking jokes and still making me laugh. Other people are saying that this has been a Disney weekend: Girl marries her prince, the bad guy is killed, the people celebrate. Then others are saying how mafia-like this killing was. Find the bad guy, kill him, bring the body to the boss to make sure it’s the right guy, and dump his body in the sea.

Whatever your take on it, if you choose to comment, I’d like to hear it. This isn’t the place to start fighting with each other. I just want to know what everyone thinks about this and where they think this country will go from here.

Away We Go

2011-04-20T15:35:00.001-05:00

I had no clue that this movie had even come out. A friend of mine had seen the beginning of it and said that the girl in the movie reminded him of me. Maya Rudolph and John Krasinski play the main characters. The story starts off with Burt going down on his girlfriend Verona and telling her that she tastes different. Well, it ends up being because she’s pregnant. Not only is she pregnant, but she doesn’t want to marry Burt (despite his asking). After finding out that his parents are leaving the country, they decide to visit a few of their friends in different states to find out where the best place “home” for them would be.

This was a really funny movie. Had some sad parts, but overall was a comedy. One of their friends in the movie ends up being Rose from Two and a Half Men (Melanie Lynskey). She plays a more serious character in this role. This movie definitely takes you into different homes and shows you how different people raise their children, their beliefs (some insane), and how they live. Maggie Gyllenhaal is also in this movie and she’s, um, ok a weirdo. She doesn’t believe in strollers. She says that people should hold their children close to their hearts and wonders why she should push her baby away from her. I was like, uh, it’s just an easier means of transportation for your child to reduce back problems. Just saying.

This movie definitely gets an A from me. If you know me and you see this movie, you’ll understand why my friend says that Maya’s character reminds him of me. Especially after I said something during the movie and she said that exact line right after me.

Move Over Soaps!

2011-04-15T08:12:00.001-05:00

There are some new shows in town! This September and coming January, ABC has announced that “All My Children” and “One Life To Live” will be done. Don’t be sad, they’re putting in some cooking shows to replace them! Among the hosts will be Food Network stars Mario Batali and Michael Symon. I love Symon! I think he has so much energy and seems so nice. And Batali is just a bundle of laughs! I never knew how silly he is until I saw him on Unwrapped. Since food has become such a big focus for everyone, ABC has decided to bring these shows on air.

I’m curious to see what these new shows are like. I don’t watch a lot of the Food Network shows where they just show how they make something. I think it’s for these main reasons: I’m a picky eater so I won’t eat what they make, they don’t give you measurements on what they’re doing so you’re really not learning anything, it’s not as enthusiastic to me. I guess I’m more of a competition challenge girl. But I do also like the shows where you learn stuff. Hopefully, these new shows will be entertaining as hell with these hosts. Every time I see them, they are making whatever they’re doing fun.

Haha. How could you not be entertained by a man with Got Pork on his chest? I mean come on! The wait begins and September cannot get here soon enough. It’s also my birthday month. This summer has a lot going on to fill up my time in the meanwhile! I hope everyone will join me in watching these guys make some food!

Pikacat

2011-04-14T15:16:00.001-05:00

This cat looks so miserable. I can relate to the cat and Pikachu because in the summer my cheeks get rosy and I look like Pikachu. It’s all photoshopped so I’m glad that the kitty was not harmed, but it did freak me out at first. I was like why would someone do that?! And how did they get the cat to sit still while they washed it. But then I kept reading and it’s not real. Still kind of fun and still looks miserable.

Waves

2011-04-11T22:13:00.001-05:00

I’ve been wanting to go surfing so badly these past few years, but haven’t gotten around to it. It was no surprise that I came across these amazing pictures. I had to share them with everyone. They were taken from an Oahu photographer. Clark Little takes pictures of these amazing waves from inside the tube.

These images are incredible. I thought these were some feel good pictures. Definitely made me miss the warm weather and swimming in the ocean.

Beginner’s Ninja School

2011-04-08T11:18:00.001-05:00

For all of you that need to learn how to judi chop, ninji chop, and karate chop. Don’t go ninjaing nobody that don’t need ninjaing!

Legos!

2011-04-05T07:20:00.001-05:00

I don’t know why but this video made me think of Metalocalypse on Adult Swim. A friend of mine showed me this and I had to share it. I’m not good at making legos do this kind of stuff. I can make a wall. Maybe a house. I should spend some time at Lego Land and see what I can come up with. Catch a few tricks from the kids.

Fart Jokes Never Get Old

2011-04-01T08:28:00.001-05:00

Redd Foxx just goes on and on with these fart jokes. When I first started watching this I thought to myself, really? How much funnier can fart jokes be when you’re an adult than when you were a kid. I still sat and watched and I have to say I did let out a good hearty bwacacaca.

Sucker Punch

2011-03-29T20:29:00.001-05:00

I waited quite some time for this movie to come out. I wasn’t excited about the PG-13 rating, but I decided to see it anyway. It was too much of an Alice movie for me to pass up.

The movie follows these five girls. Sweet Pea and Rocket are sisters. The story begins with Babydoll’s mother dying. Her stepfather tries to either molest or rape her and she fights back and scrapes his face. To spite her, he locks her in her room and goes into her sister’s room. In an effort to save her sister, she climbs out the window and sneaks up behind her stepfather with a gun only to accidently kill her sister. This causes him to have her institutionalized.

The movie took a whole new turn when it turned into this whorehouse burlesque home- I don’t even know how to describe it. Babydoll makes a plan to try to help her and her friends escape the place and in order to get all of the items they need to escape, she dances to escape to this other dimension. In this dimension the girls fight to get what they need to help them escape.

Madam Gorski teaches the girls to perform and dance. She’s a bit of a hardass, but only because she needs to be.

I really thought that this movie was going to be more of a girl not being aloud to have a life and being a victim of her step father or adoptive father and the only place she goes to is school. I thought Madam Gorski was going to teach her to escape in her mind to help her brave it out until she could find a way to escape for real. Definitely was not that story.

Now I know I say this all the time for movies,,,, but PAY ATTENTION. Pay attention to every face and every detail in the movie. It will all come together in the end if you pay attention. If you’re too busy trying to get the last of the M & M’s at the bottom of the box, you’re going to miss something.

There were a lot of things that I really hope will be different when the DVD comes out. For instance, there is a scene where Amber is shooting at something and she yells out “Take that you ugly mother….” and then there is no sound, but you can see her mouthing out the word fucker. There was another part where the man is telling one of the girls that he wants to do something to her but that part was also blocked out and his back was turned to the camera. Then there is a scene where they are fighting robots and when shot, air comes out of them (like blood) and that’s what kills them. So there were a lot of things that were done to keep this movie at a PG-13 rating. My guess is because there was so much hype about it that they were hoping it would attract a larger audience bringing in more monies at the box office. Hopefully when it comes out on DVD, there will be an unrated version.

I did like it. Very Alice in Wonderlandish. In fact, Zack Snyder describes it as an “Alice in Wonderland with machine guns”. Which actually during the movie I screamed a bit because in the new Alice in Wonderland soundtrack Grace Potter and the Nocturnals cover the song “White Rabbit” by Jefferson Airplane and I heard it in Sucker Punch. I was like this is the Alice song! But I believe that the movie used the original song. The main character Babydoll is played by Emily Browning who also sings three songs on the soundtrack. The music throughout the movie was actually really good, so I think I might check out the soundtrack and let you know how that is as well.

Lisa Lampanelli

2011-03-27T12:09:00.001-05:00

This woman is one of the FUNNIEST and NICEST people that I have ever met. Yes, I met her. After a show she stayed and took pictures, signed autographs, and talked with everyone that was in line to meet her. I had just seen another comedian (he will remain nameless) and he wouldn’t do a meet and greet unless you paid for something. She wasn’t like that. When I told her my story, she knew exactly who that was. She took pictures with me and I still have to get them developed. I can’t get enough of her. I have one of her DVDs and every time I watch it I laugh harder than before. It’s like I’ve never seen it before. You can always catch her at a roast. For instance:

While I was looking up some videos of her, I found out that she was engaged! I think she’s married by now and I couldn’t be happier for her! Lisa is notorious for loving the chocolate daddies. I really thought that Jimmy Big Balls was black, I found out in this interview that he is not.

I also found out she has a book! Where the fuck have I been? Of course, I will be getting it, and reading it, and blogging about it.

The Walking Dead

2011-03-24T08:24:00.001-05:00

I know the season has been over for a few months already, but I went to the movies and saw an advertisement for the first season. If I was girly, I would have shrieked. I started reading the Robert Kirkman comic books before the series came on. Then Halloween came. I dressed up, I got ready, I had counted down the days for this, and season one of The Walking Dead came on. I kept getting confused because (obviously) the story from the comics differed a bit from the series. Still, I was so excited! The effects were great. I was so happy about that, because had the makeup and effects been shitty I would have been done with watching it after the first episode.

The story follows Rick, a police officer that wakes up from a coma in the middle of a zombie apocalypse. Since everyone has left town for the most part (besides the zombies), he has to fend for himself and attempt to find shelter, food, and most of all his family.

Season one came and went and I was left with wanting more. I couldn’t get enough of The Walking Dead! With that, I read all 13 volumes that were out. One right after another. And here I sit waiting again.

Kirkman hated the typical zombie stories. There’s an apocalypse but somehow the main characters survive and ride off into the sunset. This always left him wondering what happened after that. Were there more zombies encountered? What happened to the zombies? With his stories, he wanted the reader to always know what happened next. You will never be left to guess what happened to this person or this person. So far in the readings, I have yet to wonder what happened to someone. There are always new characters being introduced as well as new settings. Each comic has a new twist to it. Just when you think things will be going one way, you get a curve ball chucked at you. I have a feeling The Walking Dead will be living on forever.

Mitch Fatel

2011-03-21T19:51:00.001-05:00

I saw this man on Comedy Central’s Top 10 Comedians. The show featured Mitch Hedberg, Jeff Dunham, and this man right here: Mitch Fatel. It took me forever to find him. Every time the special would come on I would always miss his name. After much research, I finally found him. I hope you enjoy him as much as I do!

Hall Pass

2011-03-17T14:27:00.001-05:00

I just went to see the movie Hall Pass. Wasn’t my first choice of movies, but I decided to give it a chance. From the previews, I figured all of the funny stuff was already shown. The rating wasn’t horrible, so I was hoping that it would make me laugh at least once. Hall Pass is a movie about two married men that get this “hall pass”. Their wives are sick of them always checking out other women and thinking that they are chick magnets. To prove them wrong, they give them one week off from marriage to do whatever they want. The women leave and the men get the house and the freedom to do anything that they damn well please.

The movie had some good parts. I wasn’t peeing my pants with laughter and snorts. At once point the movie takes a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT direction. There are some good one liners in there. Definitely a Farrelly brothers movie. I was told before going into the movie that the end leaves you asking questions in the end. I think that from the climax on you’re already asking what the fuck?

This was just a feel good movie. Nothing amazing or spectacular, but good. I thought you’d end up seeing tons of boobies or a montage like in Wedding Crashers. If that’s what you’re looking for you’re not going to get it. Also, fair warning, there is full frontal male nudity. Check it out, see what you think. You’ll definitely laugh at least once.

Snake Bite

2011-03-15T19:40:00.001-05:00

I heard about this story today and I could not believe it. This model was at a photo shoot with a snake and the snake bit her! In the boob! When I first saw it, I thought nipple piercing. Watch for yourself and see what happened.

This was crazy. I’ve obviously worked with a snake before (see blog: Hannibal Mint Photo Shoot) and there are certain signs you need to look for when working with them! That little jerk the snake did right before he went for her, I would have been like I’m done. The snake wasn’t happy. Also, the owner should have made sure that the snake was fed. She was trying to be all scandalous and she’s lucky the snake didn’t bite her tongue. The worst part about this story is that the snake died. That’s right. Can you guess of what? If you said fake titty you are correct. The snake died of silicone poisoning. I was so sad. Yep, fuck the girl I was on the snake’s side.

Not To Worry!

2011-03-13T14:46:00.001-05:00

For those of us that are worry warts (yes, I am included sometimes…. most of the time…. shut up) this story was made for us! We are going to live forever!

Worrying is ok now?! Tomorrow it will be bad for us again and the day after that it will help cure the blind. I know someone that worried themselves sick- literally. I think worrying is more like stress, you need SOME in your life. You just shouldn’t let it take over. That will just make you paranoid. I also think that the too much optimism thing is what killed Mr. Rogers.

Corporal Punishment

2011-03-09T15:09:00.001-06:00

While watching the news last night, there was a very interesting story that came on. Corporal punishment in schools. If you don’t know what this means, it’s simple: students are being hit by educators as a means of discipline. In 20 states this is still legal. I thought we were past that. Marc Ecko, the man that I swear is everywhere, has decided to do something about this. He’s created a campaign to “Fight The Paddle”. Up to 20,000 students request medical treatment EACH YEAR for this type of violence. I couldn’t believe it. Some of the pictures that they showed of the children bruised up just boggled my mind. You can watch the video for yourself.

Here is my request to everyone: Please share this blog, share the website http://unlimitedjustice.com/, follow @UnltdJustice, download the app, tell your friends, tell your family, shout it out from the top of your lungs! This has to be stopped. No child should have to endure this type of punishment or embarrassment from an educator. They are supposed to be our mentors and people that we can go to for support and safety. They are there to TEACH not to HARM.

The Will To Live

2011-03-06T13:50:00.001-06:00

The other day I was reading an article online about immigration and how more states are trying to adopt the Arizona laws. After reading that and getting angry at how Americans that had been polled think of immigration as a number one priority instead of the economy, I stumbled upon another article. In Sulphur, Oklahoma there was an animal control officer ordered to kill about 7 puppies that were malnourished in the animal shelter. The facility was overcrowded and the puppies were to be put down along with two larger dogs that had been abandoned. At this point I’m like why gawd why! The dogs were given two sedatives: in the foreleg and in the heart. A doctor thoroughly checked the dogs and pronounced them all dead with no heartbeat. The animal control officer had put all of the dogs in a trash container that would be disposed of its contents the next day. All of the puppies were buried under the two large dogs in the container. The next day the officer found the container still full along with another little miracle. One of the puppies was sitting ON TOP of the dogs staring at him! Not only did he survive weather in the 30s that night, but he survived having the two larger dogs piled on top of him.

After being checked out by a vet, little girl in the town named him Wall-E since in the movie Wall-E was the last survivor on Earth. His story has generated a huge response. People are either trying to adopt him, donate money to board him, or just checking up to see how he is doing. He is in great health and the vet is in the process of finding the best home for him. I couldn’t believe this story when I read it. It gave me such a big smile on my face and left me ready to face the day! This miracle puppy has cheated death and I can’t wait for him to find a great home!

Auto Show

2011-03-03T15:00:00.001-06:00

I went to the auto show and was a little disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, there were some amazing cars there, I just expected more concept cars. I also tried winning a penguin without success. A lot of the cars I wanted to sit in were locked. I was like what’s the point of that? I heard some cars were vandalized. I did see some scrapes on cars and then saw some that were full of dust as if they hadn’t been washed in years. I’m not sure if those were the vandalized ones or not, but why do people have to ruin it? I took a ton of pictures of different cars I thought were fun looking.

I love the blue color on this car.

This car I would have loved to sit in. But it was roped off and I’m sure locked.

This yellow ass car is the only one that I sat in. It took at least 5 minutes of waiting for this little kid to get out of the driver’s seat. There were SO many people there, it wasn’t worth waiting to sit in every car that I wanted to.

I should have just jumped over the barricades and stood next to the cars. I mean no harm.

If the car had food on it, I most likely took a picture of it.

This Octopus Car had to have been my favorite. The back was popped so you could see inside and those submarine windows were tinted a sea color that you could still see outside. I loved it!

You would think that with this Call of Duty Jeep that they would have had an area where you could play the game. Though they did have an area for the kids to play video games, it was not COD.

I was watching the news and I saw that Lighting McQueen was going to be at the show. I was like ahh! They were a little hidden, but I was so glad I got to see them.

I’m a fan of flat black,,,, and Playstation.

I love the old cars. I can’t wait for the summer to go to all of the outdoor car shows.

I like the design on this car.

This car looked black, but when you got up close you could see that it was a dark green.

Though I could not find the people giving away the actual Hot Wheels cars, I did get a picture of the sign. They had two different ones.

Rant

2011-02-17T19:15:00.001-06:00

Another Chuck Palahniuk book that is pretty twisted. This is the story of Buster Casey, or Rant as he was known. It’s a little confusing because it goes back and forth between characters. The book is written out like a play. Character name: Characters says. It’s a bit of a twisted book. If you haven’t noticed, I read a lot of twisted books. Get used to it. Rant gets off on bites. Not the normal kind of getting randy and your girl bites your collarbone bites. He gets off on animal bites. Snake, raccoon, spider, animal bites. He looks for them. He’ll stick his arm down a hole not knowing what’s in there just to get bitten. Yes, he has rabies. He also has a very keen sense of smell. To add to that, he’s named the “Pussy Psychic”. One whiff and he can tell you what your diet for the day has been, if not the week.

This is another one of Palahniuk’s books where the main character’s story is told by others. You never read anything about Rant first hand. The book is played out almost like an interrogation of everyone. Once you find out what’s going on, it’s a little awkward. Without ruining it, the only thing I will say is that everything happens for a reason.

Snuff

2011-02-15T19:33:00.001-06:00

Ahh, Snuff. If you' haven’t read this book, maybe you should. This book follows four characters. Three men and a woman. Each chapter is divided up into the thoughts, lives, and actions of one of these characters. This book is about a porn star, Cassie Wright, getting ready to do the porno of her life. 600 men in one day setting a new world record. The three men in the story are Branch Bacardi- Mr. 600, the reigning male porn star. Featured in plenty of Cassie’s films and looking to help her set her record while trying to keep his career alive. Mr. 72, an 18 year old hell bent on trying to save Cassie. Reason being he believes he is the secret son that she gave up when he was born. Then there is Mr. 137 trying to prove to himself and the world that he is straight. The female in the story is Cassie Wright’s assistant, Sheila, her story tells much of Cassie’s personal life and the lengths she takes to get ready for this role.

This novel is pretty graphic, I would say. I don’t think you’ll ever look at porn the same way again after reading this. Palahniuk’s description of how the adult industry works is enough to make someone want to try and pull a planned gang bang off themselves. He’s worked out every detail in this book- everything written in this book, no matter how stupid it may seem that he’s mentioned it, has a purpose for why it’s written in there. Though you don’t get the first-person view of Cassie Wright’s life, you get to know her very well. Pick up a copy. It’s pretty wild.

The Wanting Seed

2011-02-10T11:30:00.001-06:00

This book by Anthony Burgess (the author of A Clockwork Orange- yes, it was a book first) starts off with a woman burying her son. The father isn’t there, family isn’t there, just the mother weeping over the death of her son. She’s angry that the doctors didn’t do everything that they could to save him. Reason being, the world is overpopulated. The ground is no good for farming and they use the dead bodies to create chemicals for the earth. Couples that give birth to more than one child are punished. Being homosexual is encouraged along with birth control and abortion.

The story follows Beatrice-Joanna, her husband Tristram, and her brother-in-law Derek (who happens to be “homosexual” and in a higher rank in the town). People, for the most part, no longer believe in a god or religion. The government has created a fictional character for people to model off. Some homes are so small that chairs, refrigerators, and other household items need to be pulled out from a wall or the ceiling. A very different time than the one that we live in now, but enough truth to it that it could very well happen in the future. The book holds a very crude type of humor to it. Reading the comments left by others on the cover, I was expecting it to make me laugh until my tummy hurt. It’s not that type of humor, though. I did wish that it would have given me more of a solid ending. I feel that it could be followed up by a second book or a short story. I did like the book and the characters reasoning for things. I loved how the government justified itself to people so that they would think that what was being done was really for the good of the country. The thinking and reasoning of the characters seems so odd, but if you can lose yourself in this book you’ll realize that it’s not strange for the times that they are living in.

Blizzard of 2011

2011-02-06T19:24:00.001-06:00

Snowmageddon, Blizzardpalooza, Snowpocolypse, SNOMG, whatever you decide to call it, it came with a vengeance!

20.2” of snow totals. There were piles of snow taller than me! It was absolutely insane. It ranked as number 3 of top snow storms. The paper boy came down my street and got stuck. Then he was able to move over just enough for the plow to come through. The plow did a nice job of shoving the snow right behind the paper boy’s truck and getting him stuck again.

I saw kids on top of their roofs, other kids were throwing each other into the snow, one kid decided to make a tunnel in the snow. My puppies had to hop through the snow to get to where they wanted.

Driving home Tuesday I saw the sky change colors twice. Traffic was horrible. My car was skidding going two miles an hour. Getting out of the car was a challenge. I could barely open the door, and when I did I almost blew away! I saw a story on the news of this lady and her daughter that had to get to the hospital because the daughter was supposed to go in for surgery so that she could hear again. The mother bundled up her daughter and put her on a sled and pulled her to the train to get to the hospital. Then while watching the news, they show a view of the street and there is a man with snow skis on skiing down the street. Tuesday night there was lightening and thunder. I saw FLASH FLASH FLASH FLASH! At first I thought it was the paparazzi, then it was followed by a BOOM! That’s when I realized no one was taking pictures.

The snow even went through the fence. I went sledding in the snow the day after…. kind of. I just had the sled and was going down the driveway as far as I could. I hadn’t gone sledding since I was about 3 years old. Then I tried sledding down the big mound that was created on the corner and when I landed in the yard I thought I wasn’t going to be able to get out. Then, I tried going down another mountain of snow that was steeper than the first. I did that twice and then decided I was cold enough and full of snow. I’m hoping to do some more sledding since we’re getting more snow. I’ll take a few pictures as well. Hopefully none of them will be of me gliding my face across the ground.

Zombie Dildos

2011-01-28T08:06:00.001-06:00

After watching all 6 episodes of AMC’s The Walking Dead and reading all 13 volumes as well, I figured this would be a wonderful blog. I’m sure that with all of the new and old Undead Heads due to the rising popularity in The Walking Dead, these are going to be flying off the shelves! Zombie lovers, get ready. Ranging from $150 to $245, you too could have your very own Zombi Art Dildo! That’s right! If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to have the undead inside of you, here is your chance! They are 7 inches long, handcrafted, and made of silicone. As the company puts it, they hand paint each one to give it “personality, and gruesome reality”. I must warn you: The following picture first of all is NOT of me using the zombie dildo. Also, you CANNOT remove this image from your ojos. You have been warned.

Don’t blame me if you lose your lunch….

I just can’t see someone at the store saying, “Yeah, I totally want to get that dong with the cheesy moldy stuff on the head!” The bottom part with the blue, veins I think, make me think of the show in Animal Planet- Monsters Inside of Me. I would, however, love to know how many of these have been sold to date and who has been buying them?

Dog Fighters Rights

2011-01-24T20:25:00.001-06:00

I know that this is a bit of old news, but it still drives me insane! Michael Vick wants to get another dog. He thinks it will help him with his rehabilitation. No matter what, the man will be labeled for the rest of his life. Is it right? Not necessarily, but it doesn’t mean that it won’t happen. If the same thing happened to someone without celebrity status, the person would have all but gotten the electric chair.

Fortunately for some of the dogs they were able to be trained and rehabilitated and some of the dogs are now used to help other people. Still some were not so lucky and had to be put down. I just don’t feel it would be fair to a new dog to be put in his home. Sadly, his children have to deal with HIS consequences. The dogs that were lucky enough to live will still have to go about the rest of their lives with the scars on them. I just don’t feel it would be fair to put another animal in the hands of Vick. This whole situation not only gave him a bad name, but he gave the dogs a bad name as well.

Toy Story 3

2011-01-23T12:19:00.001-06:00

Yet another cartoon watched by Chris Star. If you’ve seen the other two Toy Story movies, you get what they’re about. Obviously. Toys come to live, they try to help each other from danger, that sort of thing. Toy Story 3 is no different. Andy is going off to college and he has to either throw his toys away or put them in the attic. He decides to take Woody with him and put the rest in the attic.

This is where it gets scary. Andy puts the other toys in a garbage bag and doesn’t get a chance to take them to the attic so his mom throws them out! Woody tries to save them and at this point the other toys think Andy doesn’t love them despite what Woody tells them (that it was a mistake). You meet some great new characters along the way. What would a Disney movie be without sexual innuendos? Of course there are plenty in there. I thought it was another funny Disney movie.

At first you’re thinking, where else could they go with Toy Story? But they actually did a great job at taking these toys somewhere you’d never think they’d go. Everyone says that you’ll cry at the end. I wasn’t sad, if anything I was HAPPY. I won’t tell you why because that will spoil the ending. I feel that the story did end with a possibility of it going on. Toy Story 4 anyone?

Despicable Me

2011-01-22T10:47:00.001-06:00

I had been wanting to see Despicable Me since the previews were coming out! It had some great one liners (“It’s so fluffy!”; “Did you brush your teeth? Let me smell. Let me smell. You did not!”) and being the huge cartoon fan that I am I couldn’t wait! There were plenty of familiar “faces” in the movie, but not necessarily familiar voices. The cast included Steve Carell, Miranda Cosgrove, Julie Andrews, Jason Segal, and Russell Brand.

I thought the movie was so funny! Of course it had some sad parts, but overall I got some good laughs out of it. The story is about this villain, Gru, that is trying to be the best. He’s in competition with another villain who is really good. Trying to steal back an idea that the other villain stole from him, Gru adopts three little girls to help him get into this guy’s house. These girls try to make him love them and be a real father to them.

Perhaps it’s just me, but Agnes looks a whole lot like Boo from Monsters, Inc.

Ok, so that’s a creepy picture of Boo. None the less they could at least be related! I love this movie and when it was first in theatres IHOP had some great combos going on. Also, if you’re wondering what all of those little twinkie things were about, they were Gru’s helpers. They also help Gru with the girls. Go watch cartoons! Pick up some accents like I did!

I Just Had Sex

2011-01-20T10:58:00.001-06:00

I was in the store the other day and I swear I thought I heard “Jizz in my Pants” playing on the radio. Upon further listening, I realized it wasn’t. A little disappointed that it was not my jam- er, I mean…. The guy on the radio sounded JUST like The Lonely Island. Still, I’m glad to see they came out with something to follow that song!

I love the airplane flying over that writes it out in the sky! I wonder what they will come up with next.

Black Swan

2011-01-17T21:51:00.001-06:00

I saw the movie Black Swan a couple of weeks ago. I have to say that I really liked it. Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis (though she will always be Jackie from That 70’s Show to me), and Winona Ryder (which I had no idea was in the movie until it was mentioned to me before it began) were all in there.

If you don’t know the story of the Black Swan ballet, there’s no need to worry. The story is explained within the movie. It’s pretty insane. I’m sure that it looks crazy from the previews, but it’s even crazier when you go see it, so be prepared. You only see a very small part of what the whole movie is about in the previews. And I know, that’s how it’s supposed to go. Really, though, there is so much more to the story than Natalie Portman’s character just trying to be the Black Swan and picking feathers out of her back.

Natalie Portman’s character seems to be schizophrenic in the movie. A timid girl with a mother that still thinks she’s a child she tries to get in touch with her dark side. I kept hearing about the movie and everyone I knew was going to see it, but from the previews I still didn’t get what it was about. Finally, someone let me in on what the movie was about and I started seeing more previews. Different previews that showed me more of what this movie had to offer.

The movie keeps you guessing as to what you think has happened and what has really happened. For any of you men that think this will be more of a chick flick with some hardcore scenes that don’t want to see it, I’ll let you in on a secret: There’s a steamy sex scene with Natalie and Mila in it. You’re welcome. I do recommend.

No sooner did the movie become a hit, of course SNL had to make a skit out of it. Starring none other than Jim Carrey himself, here is what the skit had to offer.

I am SO glad I saw the movie before I saw this!

Porcelain

2011-01-16T13:42:00.001-06:00

These dolls are amazing. They make me think of the song “Porcelain” by Shades of Fiction. I want one of me made…. Except with a pole! If Sasha Petrov would like to put some fruit around me, that’s fine too. I like fruit.

I first saw this picture from far away, I wasn’t sure what it was but I thought it looked good. Then when I got a closer look I realized just how amazing these are.

They remind me of something that Tim Burton would create.

I love how each one has her own personality. They’re all off in their own world….

They’re not perfect. Even the blush on this one is no where near perfect. Something that we all strive for,,,, the unattainable “perfection”.

I love the swirls on her hat and overcoat.

With that hair she reminds me of the Red Queen.

This one is all sexified.

She looks like she’s smelling something funky.

Such simple dolls, yet they tell extraordinary stories.

I Kissed a Girl

2011-01-13T11:24:00.001-06:00

Something short and simple for today. If you’ve ever read Katy Perry’s profile it reads: I kissed a girl AND diddled her skittle. Apparently, these people weren’t fans. Creative, but I don’t know if it’s going to stop anyone. My recommendations to them: Don’t go see Black Swan.

Pole Dancing Olympics

2011-01-10T18:42:00.001-06:00

I’m very excited to announce that pole dancing may be in the 2016 Olympics in Brazil. The founder of the International Pole Dance Fitness Association, Ania Przeplasko, is talking with the International Olympic committee. If she succeeds, pole dancing will me a test sport in these Olympics. As she puts it, pole dancing combines jogging, weightlifting, and dancing. If you’ve never done it before I must say it really is a FULL BODY workout. If this is a success and they put pole dancing in the Olympics it will be able to feature a regular and a disabled division as they have it in the Pole Dancing Championships. This year it was held in Tokyo, Japan recently. They had men and women competitors and a hearing impaired woman from Japan took top honors in the disabled division.

Though there is no point system for the sport yet, my guess is that they will create one similar to gymnastics. With pole dancing becoming more main stream, there is a bigger chance of it becoming a sport in the Olympics. Unfortunately, the biggest hurdle will be getting it away from the stigma of the strip clubs. I have high hopes for it! I love dancing and have made a few videos where I’m performing. If it makes it, I will be working my ass off to get in the next one if not THIS one.

My favorite is when I tell people about the pole dancing and one of the first questions asked is, “Can guys do it?” Don’t be fooled, men know how to work a pole just as well if not better than many of the women I’ve seen! If you’ve never tried it, I suggest you do! Http://StarfyreInc.com sells X-Poles that are easy to set up.

Who will be competing with me in 2016?

Crash Kings

2011-01-02T11:00:00.001-06:00

Over the summer I got to see Crash Kings at a smaller venue so I was RIGHT in their faces. I was pretty excited.

It was such a good show! They played their whole album.

I really love the picture on the bass drum.

If you’ve noticed from the pictures so far, there are no guitarists. The band only has a vocalist/keyboardist, bass, and drums. And the bassist and vocalist are brothers.

I would suggest looking them up if you don’t know who they are. The show was pretty packed for a Wednesday. Especially for summer time in a college town. I took a few pictures, got to dance, and at the end of the night ended up getting a set list. I was hoping to take a picture with the band, but the opportunity wasn’t there. Still, I was happy with my set list and my pictures.

Little did I know that the end of the year would bring a new opportunity for me to see them again!

They played at the Cubby Bear North and I am SO glad that was the choice that was picked for the night!

They covered “In Bloom” and “War Pigs” and it was just such a fantastic night! They played their whole album, plus a few new songs or “Songs that didn’t make the first album” as they put it. The crowd didn’t get too wild, thankfully.

I took SO many pictures! More than I could probably put on here in one blog. Also there is one video with someone you may know in it. After we rang in the new year, the drummer, Jason, took his champagne bottle and sprayed champagne all over us. I was trying to hide so I wouldn’t get my camera wet.

At one point during the night, two girls ran up on stage. The lead singer says into the mic, “We have visitors.” The girls end up telling him that they want to dance for them and he invites everyone up on stage. The girls pull me up first and it’s just the three of us until people start crowding the stage.

This was my attempt at a curtsey. As you can see I was decked out in stars. I also had earrings in that have stars all over them, but you can’t see them in the pictures.

This was once more people got on stage, just before they started playing again.

I was pretty happy being up close to them and having no barricades that were separating me from the stage. Being able to take pictures of them while they were playing standing right next to them to this show to a whole new level.

Waiting for the band, there weren’t a lot of people. I knew that closer to them getting on stage it would fill up. There was also an upstairs that I don’t know how many people were up there. During the show I saw a lot of people gathered around the balcony. While I was on stage there were so many people up there and when I looked out there were still so many people on the floor!

I look like a creeper, but I didn’t want to be hugging him and on top of him while he was trying to play. He was also walking backwards while I was behind him. I almost look photoshopped. Haha, I swear I’m not though!

This picture is one of my favorites. I can’t believe they let us stay up there for as long as we did. The bassist, Mike, was trying to get everyone off stage after the first song that we were all up there for. I totally get it, people were all over him and stepping on his cord and his pedals. His brother, Tony, was like let’s just let them stay. Mike, “So, we're keeping the people?” It was pretty crazy. At one point someone stepped on his pedals, so we crowded around them so that no one would step on them anymore.

It was so much fun! After the second song we all got off and they finished their set. It was so incredible. They’re really nice guys. And as promised, here is a video from the show….

Chris Star dancing for Crash Kings NYE.

At the end of the night I managed to get another set list. I didn’t get my picture with the whole band, but I did get a picture with Tony.

Thanks Tony, it was really nice of you to take the time to get a picture with me. It was great of them to spend their New Year’s out here with us. Especially after being in Vegas the night before. I hope they had as much fun as we did!

Noah’s Ark

2010-12-29T19:30:00.001-06:00

As well as Mount Olympus, I got to go to Noah’s Ark this summer. It was right down the street from Mt. Olympus and it was a really warm day. There were TONS of rides and waterslides! I went on pretty much every single ride there was.

They claim to be America’s largest waterpark and I believe it. I hadn’t been there since I was a baby, but I kept seeing them on different shows on television. They were on the travel channel and a few other shows that showed the top best waterparks of the nation. They had SO much stuff to do. And note to you, if you ever get a chance to go here BRING WATER SHOES! It’s like walking on a driveway all over the park, it hurts your feet. They have little shoe cubbies at every ride.

This picture I actually took as we were turning in the car. I said I was going to get the shot and I thought it wasn’t going to come out right, but when I looks at my camera screen it was perfect! Then I decided that I wanted to take a picture with this guy.

I’m not sure who Bert the Conquerer is, but he must have good taste in waterparks. There were huge slides everywhere. Tube slides, dark slides, the longest slide in the world, the one and only inverted slide (I’ll talk about that one soon), slides that hit water into your face, and just a bunch more slides. I learned my lesson from Mount Olympus, I had thought the tube was flipping, so I let go and held my breath, but when I got up I saw I was the only one that fell and the tube never flipped. Everyone, even the life guards, was laughing at me!

There was this HUGE slide there! It was the talk of the park. There was even an “Observation Area” for those too chicken to go on it. The line was massive and I had to try it. It’s supposed to be the one and only inverted waterslide. From talk I was hearing in line, there were people that had gotten stuck. You needed to weigh a certain amount to even go on it. Here’s what happens: You wait in line forever, go up tons and tons of stairs, read all of the “warnings” that are posted up all over the ride, read the signs that make you want to shit your pants (this is the point where you try to drown out the screams, this is the point where your palms get sweaty….), then you finally make it to the top! You go on the other side of this slide and there is a lifeguard that is giving you directions while you stand on a scale. Then you go into this tube chamber and you cross your arms and put your feet all the way back. There is a countdown in the chamber (3, 2, 1….), then the bottom drops and you free fall for about 8 feet before you do a loop de loop and come shooting out at the bottom! Oh my gosh, it makes my heart race just thinking back to it. That ride is the Scorpion’s Tale and it is SO amazing!

As you can see from the huge interactive map they have in the front, it is all by it’s lonesome. It’s really not, though. There is one ride on the left of it and one on the right. I can’t wait to go back next year! I want to do it again! There was another ride that I got to go on. It was a dark tube slide and in the middle of one of the dark tubes I yelled out “SCORPION’S TAIL!”

As promised I took a picture with the Noah’s Ark Alligator. This is where you can see my lovely tan lines from the Air Show. A perfect end to a perfect day. Even though it was a late start, every ride was ridden, and then it was time to go back home.

But not before I stopped to take a picture in front of the Wisconsin Dells sign.

As soon as I saw the sign when I got there I HAD to make sure I took a picture before I left! This is the last even that I got to do before going home.

Sleeping Beauty

2010-12-17T22:55:00.001-06:00

As many people know, I’m a huge Disney fan. So I couldn’t believe it what I found out about Sleeping Beauty!

Let me tell you the REAL story along with some background. The early fairytales dated back to 1634 weren’t clean cut the way we know them today. They told stories of rape, murder, incest, cannibalism, and a bunch of other shit that would NOT help put your kids to sleep. I couldn’t believe it! The original works had to be translated and cleaned up a bit before they were published as the nice tales we know today. For instance, originally Sleeping Beauty did not get a kiss from her Prince Charming. Oh no, watch out ladies because that is NOT what happened!

The story goes that Sleeping Beauty got a splinter running poisonous flax in the palace. Her father put her “sleeping” body on velvet and put her in the forest. (What the fuck, dad! I fall asleep and you put me outside??) Then Mr. Prince Charming, who’s really just a nobleman with monies goes hunting in the woods, finds her, and rapes her. Yeah, that’s right. Then she gets pregnant. Nine months later she gives birth. (How? I don’t know since she’s supposed to be SLEEPING.) She has twins she names Sun and Moon and the forest fairies take care of them. The fairies put the babies on her breast and somehow one of them got her thumb instead and sucked out the poisonous splinter (yet the baby did not die or fall asleep from the poison.)

Months later, the man comes back to have sex with her again, but this time she’s awake. (In all of those months, my ass would have gone back home!) The nobleman tells her he raped her and they have sex again in some barn. (This is where I was like what the fuck?? She doesn’t even KNOW him!) Then he goes home to his wife. (Typical.)

Somehow the wife finds out about the babies and orders for them to get kidnapped and cooked…. ALIVE. The cook ends up making the dish and the nobleman eats it and the wife tells him that he’s eating his babies. (This next part reminded me of Snow White.) The cook ends up being a softie and he didn’t kill the babies, he cooked a goat instead. And Sleeping Beauty, her rapist lover, and their children lived happily ever after…. in the woods I’m guessing.

Mt. Olympus

2010-12-14T16:58:00.001-06:00

I had not been to the Dells since I was about 3. I had been wanting to go and never got around to it. I love water parks and water slides and so I could not WAIT to go. It was a good road trip with lots of laughs. I was making the truckers honk at me like a kid.

We got there early so that we could go to the waterpark all day. We stayed at Hotel Rome at Mount Olympus. They had an indoor waterpark, outdoor waterpark, outdoor theme park, and an indoor theme park.

The suite was really nice. It stayed with the whole Rome theme and it had a whirlpool that was great to relax in after a long day.

They also had wristbands for guests that were staying at their hotels. These wristbands gave you access all day the day of your stay, all day the day of your checkout at the theme and waterparks, and also an After Dark pass. The theme park opened after hours for the guests or people that wanted to buy the wristbands. We went on go karts, walked around, rode a roller coaster called The Cyclops. Next year, I’m going on Hades. This rollercoaster is HUGE and goes underground. When you’re in the parking lot, you can feel the ground shake.

Those are the outdoor waterpark and the bugs on the windshield.

Look at that mean ass eye of his. That is actually part of one of the go kart rides.

I took some pictures in front of the hotel entrance. It almost looks like I’m creeping outside of someone’s room.

Christmas Threats

2010-12-11T16:12:00.001-06:00

I received this text and I thought it was quality. I had to share it with everyone:

Dear Santa,

Either you get me what I fucking want for Christmas, or Dasher and Dancer are next! Make it happen, fucker !

No sooner did my friend send me a text back:

Dear Wanna Be Thug 2 Yr Old,

You are getting coal for Christmas. And all my reindeer have been through navy seal training and have been running black ops since you were in your father’s nuts…. So, I encourage you to try something and watch your little chicken nugget head get smashed in!!

Love,

Santa

P.S.- Change your diaper…. You smell like Rudolph’s ass!

Oh the holidays. =)

Cubs Game and Kuma’s

2010-12-09T20:40:00.001-06:00

I got a chance to go to a Cubs game this summer and I was SO excited! First, was a virgin trip to Kuma’s Corner. I had heard about this place from friends and Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives on the Food Network so I could not WAIT to get there! Look them up, they have burgers named mainly after metal bands. It was SO good. They serve their burgers on a pretzel bun. Being the picky eater that I am, I wasn’t so sure how much I would like that. I ended up loving it! The place was packed and the bartender had told someone that was the slowest she had been all day.

After getting our bellies all full was the trip to the Cubs game. I could not wait to get there because they had just put in a noodle and I wanted to take a picture in front of it. This noodle is a promotion for Kraft mac and cheese and I had seen it on the news so I couldn’t wait to get there.

I took a picture before the game and then I took a few after. I wanted to lay on top of the noodle, but it’s bigger than you think! I didn’t want to get boosted up there and fly over on top of my head or end up getting hurt somehow, so I decided I would just sit down in front of it.

I had such a good time at the game! There was a guy selling water and he had the huge glasses on that he punched the lenses out of and he kept yelling “WATER! HEY, WATER! HEY, YOU NEED WATER TO LIVE!” He must have made a killing just because he was so entertaining.

It was such a nice day. This summer was a great one!

Air Show

2010-12-08T12:59:00.001-06:00

This past summer, I got to go to the Air Show. It was at an airport so there were tons of airplanes and helicopters that you could sit in and take pictures.

There were tons of jets and planes and in the sky the smoke sometimes made pictures. There was one where they made a heart with an arrow going through it. It was SO loud! And some of them were going so fast that you wouldn’t hear the boom until a few seconds after they passed.

There was also a monster truck that had wheels as big as me.

There were a lot of things to see and do there. It was a lot of fun. I also made a big boo boo and realized that I was going to get tan lines from my skirt. Being as smart as I am, I decided that I would fold up my skirt so that they wouldn’t be so bad. What I DIDN’T think of was how I had sprayed myself with sunscreen and the part that didn’t get any, ended up tanning more than the rest of me. You’ll see that in some of my summer pictures.

As you can see, they roped off the front part of the helicopter so that I could not hotwire it and hijack it from there. I don’t know where I could have taken it to, they would have found me immediately. It was huge.

Slayer Christmas

2010-12-03T18:59:00.001-06:00

I’m sure most of you have seen this, but I still absolutely love it! Just to prove we metal kids celebrate in style! Enjoy!

Showers

2010-12-01T20:18:00.001-06:00

I LOVE LOVE taking hot, steamy showers! I think in a past life I was a fish because I love the water! Yum! Especially on lazy Sunday. Wake up, eat brefakst, and shower! The water feels so nice! That’s the best part of the summer and going for a swim is that the water is warm! I love it!

I was looking through my pictures and I found my shower photoshoot! I thought these were lost I was so excited to find them!

XOXO

Matrix

2010-12-01T20:13:00.003-06:00

I finally saw the first Matrix so now everyone can quit making fun of me! I had seen parts here and there so during the movie as I was piecing it together I kept saying, I know this part. It was a good movie, I liked it. Made you open your mind a bit. I guess it’s like what acid would do to you,,,, very, very mild acid. Haha. I really liked how it was Alice in Wonderland-ish. And everyone knows how much I love Alice. It’s coming soon!! I think that in a sense, for those of you that have seen it (which most likely is all of you), our brains do “download” information and have it available for later use. It’s learning,,,, just that we don’t learn at such a quick pace. I’d love to be like ok, I want to learn to play the drums, shove the card in my head and let’s do this! And if this is not reality, the damn cold sure does feel real to me. I keep trying to think that it’s not cold outside, but it is. Maybe I’m just not doing it right.

I’ve been wanting to take Ju Jitsu for a few years now, but I’ve just been so busy with everything. This movie made me think of it more. And it also made me wonder if we as humans could possible dodge bullets. Take, for instance, karate, everything is taught in a slow manner but when it is applied you are moving at a much faster speed. To defeat your opponent, you almost have to know what move is coming next so that you can execute your move to counteract theirs quickly. So, if our minds are trained to see everything moving at a much slower pace, then we could avoid things such as accidents, hits, falling on our faces because we would be able to react in time to prevent these actions from happening. I’ma work on that and I’ll let everyone know how it goes.

Chris Star Excitement

2010-12-01T20:13:00.001-06:00

This past weekend I got to go to a metal show. I hadn’t been to one in a while and I was starting to miss it. The band that headlined was named Kaos Katalyst. They were actually really good. I had fun. They had a lot of energy on stage and the guitarist kept running around in the crowd, I loved it. Haha. They are recording their first EP in March, so I hope to hear more from them soon! Next time I see them I hope to start a pit. The party doesn’t start until I arrive! =D

After that I went to Woodman’s for the first time ever! They have no doors in their freezer section so all that half of the store was FREEZING! And we all know how much I love the cold! Got some food and decided I was going to skip through the parking lot waving the shopping bags around. We were just WAITING for the bags to break and everything to go flying all over. In which case I would have stopped, turned around slowly, and said, “We need to go get more pancake mix!”

I also went to see Shutter Island with Leonardo DiCaprio in it. It’s a Martin Scorsese film. At first I was like what is this?? And then as the movie went on and you started making your guesses I was like ooh. It’s a thinking movie and I love those kinds of movies where you have to put the pieces together. I had figured a good part of it from the beginning, but not all of it so once it started making sense I was happy. I had this guy that kept kicking the back of my seat so I decided to turn around and rip him a new one. I scared all of my row and all of the back row. He was so startled that he crouched up in his seat and yelled out sorry immediately. DON’T KICK MY SEAT AT THE THEATRES! If you go, don’t be an asshole! Karma comes around so watch it!

I also had a buffalo chicken sandwich and I haven’t had one of those in a while. I had been craving one, they are so nummy! I was so happy. I love food so much! It makes me dance, and hum, and moan. Yeah, it’s a bit odd eating with me, but it’s so nummy!

Hair

2010-12-01T20:08:00.001-06:00

My hair used to be extra super long. So long that I have donated it twice already. The first time I did it I had two jobs and I didn’t tell anyone I was doing it both times I’ve done it and people don’t recognize me. It’s so funny, people that I’ve known for years just walk right past me. I had people at both of my jobs think I was a new girl and no one was talking to me. Or I would be talking over the walkie talkies and they would be like, “Chris, where are you?? I didn’t even know you were here!” I’m like uh, you’re looking at me. Haha.

Here are two pictures from when I was in makeup school just before I cut my hair.

These are before I cut my hair, the day I donated it the second time.

And this is after. =)

Bye bye hair, I hope you went to a child that needed it!

Priceless

2010-12-01T20:04:00.001-06:00

I got this email and I just HAD to share it! This family just doesn’t know what he sees in her,,,,

Where would you even find a dress like this?? One wrong move and, OHP AREOLA! You can’t even put your arms up when the dj tells you to in that dress!

Earthquakes

2010-12-01T20:02:00.001-06:00

In light of today’s event, I asked my friend if I could share a story that he told me a little after the earthquakes in Haiti. As many of you know there are many orphans from the earthquake and people are trying to adopt children from Haiti to help out. So my friend was asked what he would do if he got a kid from Haiti. His response:

I would meet him at the airport, give him a big hug and say, “It’s ok, buddy. You’re safe now.” Take him home, feed him, get his belly all full. Then I’d take him to bed, tuck him in, “Good night buddy, see you in the morning.” Then in the middle of the night, I’d go in his room and shake the shit out of him and yell, “IT’S HAPPENING AGAIN!!”

I was like you are going to HELL. That is HORRIBLE!! Poor kids have gone through enough without needing this fuck to give them a heart attack. So then we started talking about like having broken shit all over the floor and having a string attached to the dresser so he could pull it down to scare the kid. Yeah, it’s bad. Straight to Hell.

Headlight Wipers

2010-12-01T20:00:00.001-06:00

I saw what I thought was the FUNNIEST thing this past weekend! We’re driving along, driving along…. got it? Pictured in your head? And then I turned to my left and said, “Wait, did you see that??” BWACACACACACA!! There were WIPERS, like how you have on your windshield, on HEADLIGHTS!

Apparently I was the only one that had never seen this before, so I was laughing my ass off being the only one amused. It just reminded me of someone having wipers for their glasses. HAHA. I can imagine these things breaking easily. And then you only have one working and one stuff moving around trying to get the snow off of your wipers. Anyone out there have these?

Transformers

2010-12-01T19:58:00.001-06:00

I got a text from my friend the other day all excited about getting Transformers. I was like uhh, the movie?? I thought he was a dumbass because I was like the movie has been out,,,, one AND two. And then he sent me pictures. He got a real transforming Bumble Bee and it even came with Sam Witwicky. Haha. I laughed so hard! I kept asking if he was pretending to be Sam and riding around on Bumble Bee. He said, “No, we’re all laying in my bed watching a movie together.” I was like, uh ok. Haha.

He said it took him a half hour to figure out how to transform him. We’ve been talking about him selling his blood to get Optimus Prime. Optimus is about $130. But if he gets Optimus we can play all day and transform them back and forth and then make them race! It’ll be great fun! ….how many times a day can you sell your blood? =)

70 Year Olds Getting Fresh With Me

2010-12-01T19:53:00.001-06:00

I was at work a few weeks back and there is a client who ends up asking me if I’m wearing extensions. I was like uh no. Now, my hair has gotten pretty long since I’ve donated it, but it hasn’t gotten THAT long. As she’s about to leave she comes up to me and I’m wearing my Bleeding Through hoodie because it is absolutely freezing all the time at my work. She starts asking me if I watch CSI Crime Scene and I was like no, but I had seen about 2 minutes of that show one day so I knew enough to know what she was talking about. She starts telling me that there’s a chick on there that is more on the goth side, as she is looking at the skull on my hoodie. She then decides to POKE the skull on my hoodie,,,, which was on my boob. SHE COPPED A FEEL. I felt like I was Lil Kim and she was Diana Ross at the VMA’s. Haha. That concluded my day of getting felt up by a 70 year old.

That’s the skull, that is on the left boob when I wear it.

A few days later I was at work and watching Tyra, that’s right when there’s nothing to do at work, that’s what I watch. Anywho, she had people on talking about their fantasies and stuff. And this Christian children’s book author admitted she wanted to be a porn star with two Chippendale dancers and have her boyfriend film it. So she told her boyfriend and he was like uhhhh,,,,, they looked like they were a bit of an older couple.

Oh, all the joys that happen at work!

Worst Cooks

2010-12-01T19:51:00.001-06:00

I’ve been watching this show called Worst Cooks in America on Food Network. It is the FUNNIEST show I have seen in a while. I didn’t know that people could be that bad at cooking. This one guy boiled a WHOLE chicken, this other chick made macaroni and cheese with three cheeses including cheddar, cottage, and smoked gouda, but it didn't all melt. This other lady had a few pieces on a cookie sheet, I thought they were cut up pears, apparently they were almond cookies, but when she shook the pan, they didn’t move. This chick that looks like Velma from Scooby Doo is on there and she thinks she’s from the ghetto. It’s odd. Kind of hard to watch sometimes. But I love the show. It makes me laugh and snort a lot. Haha. I definitely recommend, you get to watch people make food, melt down, and you get a good laugh out of it! You can probably catch reruns of the episodes online. Just look it up. One lady said that her kids cry when she makes a meal. She gave her meal to the chefs and they asked if she fed that kind of her stuff to her kids. Her response was, “No, my kids won’t eat that.” HAHA.

Food Network has some of the best shows. That and Animal Planet I always have on. I love animals and food. Yum food! I have my pick for who I think is going to win this show. Check it out and let me know who you think will win! We can be addicted and laugh together! The end is coming close I think it’s tomorrow actually, which is odd because it’s a Sunday show. They keep telling me tomorrow, I’ll believe them!

StereoSex V.2

2010-12-01T19:50:00.001-06:00

I went to the StereoSex show last night and I ALMOST didn’t make it. I got a text from Joe, who is the drummer and he said they were going on in 10 minutes. I finally found a place to park, and I RAN like Forest! I flew in JUST as they were about to begin their set. They played only a few songs before the owner told them they had one song left and they got cut short. I missed the band before them obviously, but the band after them was HORRIBLE. The lady had the microphone so high up I thought she was going to hit herself in the eye with it. Why they got cut short no one knows. For the few songs that they did get to play they were really good. I was excited to finally see them play. One of their originals called “Just a Dress” is a great song and it was the one I was waiting for them to play. I had a lot of fun. Lots of laughs. The guys in the band are great guys. We took some pictures and stuff. And then took some of Pete (the bassist) goofing off. That one is for another blog! Haha.

I’ll definitely be posting another blog post to show you some of the crazy stuff that happened last night. Haha. They have a show on Valentine’s Day, or as Joe calls it “VD Day” because, “you have sex and then you get VD, so it’s VD Day.” that will be broadcasting live online. I’ll be attending as long as I’m still kicking and I’ll have pictures from that day as well! =)

XOXO

StereoSex V.1

2010-12-01T19:49:00.001-06:00

I’m off to the StereoSex show tonight. We’ll see what kind of shenanigans I get myself into. I’m planning on voguing at least one of the members fo sho. Maybe I’ll even make a new video of my crazy dancing. Not the normal sexy dancing, but a weird Chris Star one. Haha. I’ll be taking lots of pictures, so this time if there is anyone there with flailing arms, I’ll have them on tape! This is the first time I’m seeing them perform live. Go check them out, show some love! I didn’t get a chance to buy some underwear to throw at them though! Guess I’ll just have to use the ones I’ve got! Haha! Maybe they’ll have a stereo there that people can have sex on. I was told that there are some things that I would have to wait to see until I got to the show, so maybe that’s it! I guessed it, I’m so smart! Forget about making the bed rock, I’ll make your stereo rock. =)

This picture was so hard to get all of the words in! If I had smaller boobs, it would have all fit! If you can’t make it out, it reads Support Local Music Sleep With a Musician. =)

Check back for pictures from the show tomorrow!

XOXO

Weekend Fun

2010-12-01T19:45:00.001-06:00

This past weekend I hung out with an old friend and we were supposed to go to a hockey game. So we get there and we go to park and they tell us that it’s sold out. So then we decide that we’re going to scalp tickets. So we go park in another lot and the guy there tells us that it’s sold out,,,, because of a fleece blanket. Are you fucking kidding me?? I missed out on a blankey?? Damn it! We go out trying to find tickets, and I was like the scalpers are probably in there because they wanted the blankets too! Change of plans, no hockey game. We go to a bar and check out this local cover band. And they play all sorts of different songs. But the singer kept talking. I was like shut up and play! I want to dance! So they play their first set and then take a break and their second set they played “Sex on Fire” by Kings of Leon, and my friend had said that he would dance for that song and Crazy Bitch. So we go out and start dancing and all of these older ladies decide to get on the bar and start dancing with the lead singer. We’re all dancing along and this one chick almost flew off the bar. They were all wasted. One lady was dancing, but it wasn’t really dancing, she was like a worm with arms. She just kept flailing her arms around. And my friend said that she looked like those blow up things that they have at the car dealerships with the crazy arms. And he was right. Then they let this chick sing “Killing Me Softly” a capella and it was super not good. I was like oh no, get her off and let’s play music so I can shake my ass! That’s right, I just wanted to shake it. Shake-shake, shake-shake, shake it. I said it. I wanted a picture with my friend since we hadn’t seen each other in forever and a half, and I asked this lady if she would take a picture of us. She asked me where the button was, and I was like at the upper right hand corner like it is on EVERY CAMERA. Then she’s pressing the wrong part that isn’t even a button, I’ll forgive her because was was wasted. She took the first one and I asked for another one. This time she decided that she was going to lunge as she takes the picture and then decides to count with her fingers at us, but she’s passing 3. We were trying to not laugh so that the picture would turn out, and once she gave me back my camera we were like bwacacacaca!! It was so funny. Good times, good times.

Tiny Dancer….

2010-12-01T19:43:00.001-06:00

My friend sent me a text that read: Little Stocking Stuffers. It had all of these nude models that were,,,, tiny. And here was one of the pictures I couldn’t resist. I had to put it up for everyone to enjoy,,,, don’t confuse her with me!

Everyone uses X-Poles!

Bumper Cars

2010-12-01T19:31:00.001-06:00

What DO you do with old bumper cars? Trash them? Scrap them for parts? Ever wonder what happens after you bump the hell out of them? Me neither, until now.

Who knew that anything more could come out of those little cars that used to give us whiplash as kids? I’m sure that’s the reason that most of the kids of today are missing more than a few brain cells.

These are road legal, that’s right- ROAD LEGAL bumper cars.

They run on Kawasaki or Honda motorcycle engines. There are 7 of these that are hanging out in California. The Long Beach Pike amusement park in California happened to have the right man come about to take the junked bumper cars off it’s hand. That man, a builder from the outskirts of San Diego named Tom Wright, decided to fumble around with these bumper cars powering them originally on Harley motors. The loud rattling from the motors drew him to using either Kawasaki or Honda instead. A couple of them have been measured to go 160 MPH which is ridiculously fast for these little buggers.

Be sure to check out their license plates.

Wanna go for a ride?

Fight Club

2010-12-01T19:07:00.001-06:00

Yeah, yeah I finally saw Fight Club. I expected there to be more fighting in it. I felt like everyone had seen it but me and lately everyone’s been talking about it and watching it again so I needed to be in with the in crowd so I’m not like what is everyone talking about!

Smelly Butt

2010-12-01T19:06:00.001-06:00

Do you know how you can tell if someone’s butt smells? I don’t really go near people’s butts unless I’m smacking them or helping to push them up on the pole, but I received an email that helped me to figure out how you can tell.

I must warn you,,,, this is icky…. you may laugh and puke at the same time.

Wouldn’t you think she would feel those on her butt? Or that either her or her people would see that there are a lot of flies following them??

Clash of the Titans

2010-12-01T18:58:00.001-06:00

I saw Clash of the Titans,,,,, in 2D. I guess the movie wasn’t made in 3D so when they made it into a 3D movie, there were a lot of parts that were blurry and the Kraken just looked like a brown blob across the screen.

2D was still good, things still popped off the screen a bit. The scenery I thought was so beautiful. I was also excited that the history was correct because I hate when I go to see something and they have it all wrong. Drives me nuts. Medusa was pretty,,,, she’s supposed to be ugly, but that’s ok. It’s Hollywood at it’s finest. I was reading that Medusa was a big reason why people wanted to go and watch it. I actually thought the movie was good, I was glad. I kept hearing a lot of bad reviews but it wasn’t as bad as everyone had made it out to be.

Hannibal Mint and Chris Star

2010-11-29T22:17:00.001-06:00

I finally, FINALLY got my photo shoot with Hannibal Mint. For those of you that do not remember, Hannibal Mint is my friend’s snake that I got to name and I’ve been waiting to take pictures with him. I had to wait because he kept getting fed on days I wanted to take pictures with him and then he was cranky if he was hungry and I didn’t want to get my hand eaten.

He liked the camera. =)

And my hair.

I love him. I’m glad he didn’t try kissing me!

I’m like a snake charmer.

We decided to have a staring contest.

“Eat the fruit and kiss the snake good night.”

Hannibal Mint Bloopers

2010-11-29T22:15:00.001-06:00

Of course I took some silly pics with Hannibal Mint! I had a few bloopers and he was really fidgety at one point I didn’t want either of us to get hurt so I was like eep! I’ll put up the good ones soon! Haha. For now, enjoy me being silly….

He was like coming at my hand in this one I was like uh oh!

I was just being silly in this one with my snake necklace. What’s that? Oh no, it’s not snake skin, but it is real. =)

He kept flying into my hair and going into the background and I thought he wanted to eat me, but he had been fed so he shouldn’t want to eat me. Snakes aren’t really aggressive, it’s more of a defense mechanism anyway.

He was staring me down in this one. I look like I’m going to eat him or something!

He crawled around to my back and then decided to plop himself down on the top of my head.

I loved these two pictures. He was looking right at the camera and they are so pretty,,,, all except for it looking like I’m picking my nose. Boo. =(

Rob Zombie

2010-11-29T22:13:00.001-06:00

I FINALLY saw House of 1,000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects by Rob Zombie.

I loved them. I’m into horror flicks. I also remember thinking that one part was taken from the Charles Manson killings. If you’ve seen the movie, you know where Baby stabs one of the other characters in House of 1,000 Corpses. In the killings, one of the chicks said that her hand was hurting her because the bones kept getting in the way when she was stabbing the woman. In the movie, Baby’s hand is hurting from stabbing. She doesn’t say that’s why, but to me, that reminded me of the Manson killings. I’m waiting for Zombie to do the next one because I have a guess as to what he will do with where he left off.

Book Reading!

2010-11-29T22:12:00.001-06:00

I read this book the other day, yes the whole book in one day, called The Stranger. It’s by Albert Camus and was originally written in French. The book is translated, which I could tell, but I really liked it.

That is obviously the original cover. The book was about this man who’s mother has just died and he really feels nothing about anything. He goes home and begins seeing this woman and his weekends become more fun. He makes friends with a man in his building and they all go on this trip to the beach where he kills a man.

I really liked the book. There were a lot of things that I could relate to with the characters and with some of the story. I do recommend. Go read!

Shedd Aquarium

2010-11-29T22:11:00.001-06:00

I recently went to the Shedd and it was so much fun. I haven’t been there since I was a kid. A kid on a field trip! I kept seeing commercials for it and then I saw a commercial that was for something COMPLETELY different but I really wanted to go! I took a lot of pictures and saw my penguin friends. Everyone knows that Happy Feet needs to see Happy Feet!

Yes, that looks like a piece of seaweed, but it is a sea dragon.

This guy thought we were friends and kept coming by.

There was a piece of glass that I was standing on and these guys were underneath. If you look closely he has blue spots on him.

Mr. Grumpus couldn’t wait to have his picture taken. He didn’t move much, he just enjoyed letting everyone stare at him.

What does that look like? Yeah, and that was at the Shedd…. in front of everyone. Where children could see!

Had to take a picture with the penguins and in this one I’m doing the pointy finger thing!

I got to touch the starfish, I was very excited. The water was freezing. There were a lot of fish that were star shaped or had star names.

These two were getting it on in front of everyone!

Softness

2010-11-29T22:09:00.001-06:00

I recently was asked how I keep my skin so smooth and soft. I had always been told that I have really soft skin, even my hands alone people are trying to hold them because they tell me that they’re soft. I never really thought that my skin was anything that was more soft than what anyone else’s skin would be, unless you’re like sandpaper skin. I have one person that recently has been exceptionally intrigued by my soft skin, so I have decided to share my secret with everyone. It’s simple really: I bathe in the blood of a thousand virgins. Yup, that’s how I get my skin so smooth and touchable soft. =)

Haha, I don’t really bathe in the blood of anything. Just water is fine. But I was told that it must be my secret that I bathe in the blood of a thousand virgins and as I was looking for some Alice stuff, I stumbled upon this picture and thought it was perfect. I honestly don’t know how I get my skin so soft, it just happens to be that way. Even after working out and getting and sweaty and sticky, it evaporates and I’m all soft again. Weird, but I like it. =)

There was a Countess in the Sixteenth Century named Elizabeth Bathory. She was Hungarian and was a serial killer that was said to have bathed in the warm blood of young women to help keep her skin beautiful. She allegedly tortured and murdered about 650 of these young woman for their blood. Crazy? Yeah, but she believed that it made her skin soft after she had punched a servant girl in the nose and had her blood on her hands. She thought that where the blood had been after she washed it off looked more fresh and young. Supposedly she also drank the blood. But then again, it’s all legend. =)

Alice In Wonderland Breaks Records

2010-11-29T22:07:00.003-06:00

I finally got to see Alice in Wonderland last night! It was SO good! I was smiling the WHOLE time! It did get a few bad reviews but if you go and look at what most people are saying about it, it is a wonderful movie!

The movie earned an incredible $116.3 million making it a record breaker for any 3-D film- including beating out Avatar. It also is the biggest opening for a non-sequel film. There had been estimates that the film would only make $65-$75 million this weekend and that was almost beat out on Friday alone ranking in $41 million. Worldwide it took in $210.3 million.

I had been reading that the tickets were selling out, so we made sure to get our tickets ahead of time and then we got there about 45 minutes before the show started to get drinks and seats and there was a line waiting to get into the theatre which I knew there would be. I definitely want to go see it again.

I know some people said that they were disappointed because it was not like the first Alice,,,, if you had looked up anything about the movie before you went to see it,,,, or checked the previews, then you find out that this is based more along the second Alice and more along the lines of the book “Through the Looking Glass” which is Alice based, but I had not read. As I had talked about in my other blogs, this is more along the lines of: When Alice goes back, it has changed and it is not the same Wonderland.

I loved a lot of the little things in the movie, for instance how all of the animals were and how they walked and talked and their roles in the movie. There was great animation and of course I saw it in 3-D! I loved it, I do recommend!

Oh People

2010-11-29T22:07:00.001-06:00

I recently read this article about this Anti-Gay California politician. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I support love and nothing else. That means if you love a woman, or a man, or whatever, I don’t care. You’re happy, I’m happy. Apparently, State Senator Roy Ashburn got pulled over for driving around like a dum dum at 2 A.M.

He was cited for a DUI. Now he can’t drive for a month, his car was impounded, he could now face fines, jail time, probation, and or have to attend classes…. speaking of faces, guess where he has JUST come from before they arrested him?

Did you guess? He was at a popular gay nightspot called Faces. Really, Asshole? I love how karma works. =)

BASEBALL!!

2010-11-29T22:05:00.001-06:00

Yay! The warmth has arrived and baseball season is here! Woot woot! Nothing better than going to a game, eating hot dogs, and watching your favorite team play being with the person or people that mean the most to you! I’m so excited! I’m a Cubbies fan, yep, that’s right. Not that I hate the Sox or anything, you’re just not my team is all. I actually had someone come into my work today and try to sell me Sox tickets after I told him I was a Cubs fan,,,, not the brightest crayon in the box.

Going to the games are the best. Watching the Cubbies on a hot summer Sunday, lounging around when you’ve got nothing else to do but sit and eat and watch them win,,,, best ever! Haha! I hope to be having a lot of those this season! Whether they win or lose doesn’t really matter as long as it’s a good game, but of course, it’s always better when your team wins. =)

Sexpo Sex Toys

2010-11-29T22:02:00.001-06:00

Has anyone else seen this? I never saw it until the Sexpo last year. The booth next to us was a sex toy store and they had it on display. I looked over and thoughts ran through my mind, I was like eep!

I looked over and waited for one of the people at the booth to look at me. Then when he did, I yelled out the first thing that came to mind when I saw that thing: Does that thing go in your ass and in your kookanook?!

He shook his head no and told me to wait a bit so that he could come tell me. There was someone in front of them. I got distracted working at my booth and then I looked over and I saw that no one was around them and he didn’t explain it to me still. So I yelled are you going to tell me what that thing does? He brought it over and turned it on and I was like I’m not touching that thing. So I asked him again if it goes in your kookanook and in your ass. And he explained that it has two settings, low and high, and showed me where the button was to turn it on. He said that one part goes in your kookanook and the other part stays out, for double stimulation or some deal. And then,,,, here comes the best part,,,, he said that because it narrows out, that it leaves room for regular intercourse! That is the part where I looked at him and said, “Sir, if that thing is inside of me,,,, NOTHING ELSE WILL FIT!” How big does he think my kookanook is??

Secretary

2010-11-29T22:00:00.003-06:00

I went to a party and we had to dress up,,,, the theme was Office Hoes and CEOs. I told my friend I would not look like a hoe, but here is what I did look like.

I had to find my glasses and everything. I looked more along the lines of a teacher or secretary which gave me a great idea for a photo shoot so be on the lookout for that. =)